Men's section...

[BCConviber]

Ok... The ladies have the ladies lounge to bash all of us in, so why don't we have one to reciprocate? I meen, if they can write jokes about us and the stupid things we do, why not the other way around? Are all the men skeered?

[TRX350_On_The_Rack]

Let's start with this

Guys' Rules


At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

Finally, the guys' side of the story.

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days..

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that?
It's like camping.

[gery350]

ladies gotta tell ya. its a mans world. you girls couldnt handle it. imaginw a woman president, we would be declaring war every 28 days. woman just couldnt handle it. like tom hanks said "THERES NO CRYING IN BASEBALL!"

[TRX350_On_The_Rack]

Ladies gotta tell ya. Its a mans world. You girls couldnt handle it. Imagine a woman president, we would be declaring war every 28 days. Women just couldnt handle it. Like tom hanks said "THERES NO CRYING IN BASEBALL!"

I'm not touching that  [smiley=Shocked.gif]

[BCConviber]

Me neither!!  

[Da_Mtg_Man]

Gery, Gery, Gery, What were you thinking? Dude they are going to tear you apart for that one....

[gery350]

i'm counting on it.

[Chela]

Those rules are pretty good.  Most of that works at my house.

[Eworm]

lol, no commet here either bud. Good luck on this one. I would have to agree with some of things said by TRX350, again only some

[BCConviber]

See? I knew nothing good would come from me starting this thread!!  

[Chela]

lol, no commet here either bud. Good luck on this one. I would have to agree with some of things said by TRX350, again only some

What's up eworm, how is everything?

[kawGIRL]

 [smiley=pirate.gif]

[Eworm]

What's up eworm, how is everything?

Good, real good. Could not ask for much more. Well, maybe the lottery would be good.

[budman]

One question... what are you guys doing in the ladies lounge?
Open yer shorts, look down, and if you don't see a......, then you really belong there.  [smiley=banghead.gif]

[qt314nfla]

One question... what are you guys doing in the ladies lounge?
Open yer shorts, look down, and if you don't see a......, then you really belong there.  [smiley=banghead.gif]

Very nice budman!  ROTFLMAO!

[crfrdr245]

Very nice budman!  ROTFLMAO!

LMAO!!!

[budman]

Very nice budman!  ROTFLMAO!

I calls 'em as I sees 'em.... I ain't got no interest in there... don't know if you girls are bashing us or not, but I don't care ....we bash y'all enough out in the open.

       [smiley=groupies.gif]

[Ida_Mann]

One question... what are you guys doing in the ladies lounge?
Open yer shorts, look down, and if you don't see a......, then you really belong there.  [smiley=banghead.gif]

I was wondering the same thing.

I also aint no kid,,,,unless I get on a quad ;-)

Id@

[big-daddy]

if you like talking to ladys its a great place to be.  :-/

[dirtydeeds]

Hay Im 40 years old and a single father of a 15 year old son. I would love to meet a lady that enjoys trail riding and camping , So guys i will have to leave the bashing alone.Im also new to this sight and the qaud thing and im hooked on both.

[Bigscrb15]

Hay Im 40 years old and a single father of a 15 year old son. I would love to meet a lady that enjoys trail riding and camping , So guys i will have to leave the bashing alone.Im also new to this sight and the qaud thing and im hooked on both.

I think hes hinting we open AtvFloridaPersonals.com

[speedman8903]

i kinda agree with grey, but dats wut he thinks so let him b. n its tru wut dirtydeeds says, it wud be kool if we meet sum1 dat lyk the same sport u do. just wish there were young gurls dat like getting dirty like us boyz.   P.S. men rule  lol

[dirtydeeds]

I think hes hinting we open AtvFloridaPersonals.com

I knew that was gona be the first reply

[stump66]

How To Shower Like A Woman...
* Take off clothing and place it in sectional laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
* Walk to bathroom wearing long bathrobe. If you see your boyfriend/husband along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom.
* Look at your womanly physique in the mirror and stick out your gut so that you can complain and whine even more about how you're getting fat.
* Get in shower. Look for face-cloth, arm-cloth, leg-cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
* Wash you hair once with Cucumber and Lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins.
* Wash your hair again with Cucumber and Lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins.
* Condition your hair with Cucumber and Lamfrey conditioner enhanced with natural crocus oil. Leave on for 15 minutes.
* Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red and raw.
* Wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa Cake body wash.
* Rinse conditioner off of hair (this takes at least 15 minutes as you must make sure that it has all come off).
* Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but decide to get it waxed instead.
* Scream loudly when your boyfriend/husband flushes the toilet and you lose the water pressure.
* Turn off shower.
* Squeegee off all wet surfaces inn the shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
* Get out of the shower. Dry with towel the size of a small African Country.
* Wrap hair in super-absorbent second towel.
* Check entire body for the remotest sign of a zit. Attack with nails/tweezers if found.
* Return to bedroom wearing bathrobe and towel on head.
* If you see your boyfriend/husband along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and then rush to the bedroom to spend an hour-and-a-half getting dressed.

How To Shower Like A Man...
* Take off clothes while sitting in the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
* Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your girlfriend/wife along the way, flash her making the "woo, woo" sound.
* Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in your gut. Check to see if you have pecs. Find out you don't have pecs. Admire the size of your wiener in the mirror, scratch your privates.
* Get in shower. Don't bother looking for a washcloth. You don't use one.
* Wash your face.
* Wash your armpits.
* Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.
* Wash your privates and surrounding area.
* Wash your butt, leaving hair on the soap bar.
* Shampoo your hair. Do not use conditioner.
* Make a hilarious shampoo Mohawk.
* Pull back shower curtain and look at yourself in the mirror.
* Pee (in the shower).
* Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice water on the floor because you left the curtain hanging out of the tub when you checked your Mohawk.
* Partially dry off.
* Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles. Admire wiener size. Leave shower curtain open and wet mat on the floor.
* Leave on the bathroom light, fan and as many taps as deemed appropriate.
* Return to the bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass your girlfriend/wife, pull off the towel, grab your groin, shout "Oh yeah, baby!" and thrust your pelvis at her.
* Throw wet towel on the bed. Take two minutes to get dressed.

[stump66]

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