St. Peter is at the Pearly Gates checking up on the people waiting to enter Heaven.
He asks the next one in line,
"So, who are you, and what did you do on Earth?"
The fellow says, "I'm Barack Obama, and I was the first black to be elected President of the United States "
St. Peter says,
"The U.S.? A black President? You gotta be kidding me! When did this happen?"
And Obama says (drum roll please),
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
"About twenty minutes ago."
How the Fight Started
I rear-ended a car, this morning, on my way to work. So there we were, standing alongside the road, steam rolling from my punctured radiator, and slowly the other driver got out of his car. And you know how sometimes you just get sooo-stressed-out that real-life stuff seems to get really funny?
Yeah, well, I could NOT believe it ... The other driver was a DWARF, only about 3 feet tall! So, he storms over to my car, looks up at me, and loudly proclaims, "I AM NOT HAPPY!"
So, I looked down at him and said, "Okay, well, which one are you then?"
And THAT'S when the fight started.
lmao
lol thats good
lol nice!!! rolback1
could we please keep the joke telling to the JOKE section.....this is getting ridiculous ::)
sooo...anyway A man walks in a bank, gets in line and when it was his turn, pulls out a gun and robs the bank!
Just to make sure he leaves no witnesses, he turns around and asks the next customer in line, "Did you see me rob this bank The customer replies, "Well, Yes I did!!" The bank robber raises his gun and shoots the man dead.
He quickly moves to the next customer in line and says to the man, "Did you see me rob the bank?"
The man calmly responds, "No, but my wife did!"
i had a dream i was a muffler.
i woke up exhausted.
Quote from: NYRAPTOR on June 18, 2008, 07:18:22 AM
i had a dream i was a muffler.
i woke up exhausted.
What...... No sock monkey jokes?
a man walks into a bar and says ...ouch
i walked into the couch last night and hurt my foot.
i had to call a toe truck.
Womens rights
I guess Can-Am ain't Happy, either. :)
i can row a boat, canoe?
a horse is pulling a guy and his dog in a wagon. the guy keeps whipping the horse
and yelling at it to go faster.
this goes on for a while and finally the horse stops.
the horse turns around and says to the guy, "if you whip me again, i'm going to kick the s... out of you.
so the guy says, "geez, i didn't know the horse could talk!"
the dog says, "neither did i."
Quote from: NYRAPTOR on June 18, 2008, 08:46:39 PM
i can row a boat, canoe?
a horse is pulling a guy and his dog in a wagon. the guy keeps whipping the horse
and yelling at it to go faster.
this goes on for a while and finally the horse stops.
the horse turns around and says to the guy, "if you whip me again, i'm going to kick the s... out of you.
so the guy says, "geez, i didn't know the horse could talk!"
the dog says, "neither did i."
:-\... wow, that was one of those that i laughed at, but not becasue of the joke, becasue it was so lame i couldnt help but laugh lol
Quote from: Chevy1500z71 on June 18, 2008, 09:15:55 PM
Quote from: NYRAPTOR on June 18, 2008, 08:46:39 PM
i can row a boat, canoe?
a horse is pulling a guy and his dog in a wagon. the guy keeps whipping the horse
and yelling at it to go faster.
this goes on for a while and finally the horse stops.
the horse turns around and says to the guy, "if you whip me again, i'm going to kick the s... out of you.
so the guy says, "geez, i didn't know the horse could talk!"
the dog says, "neither did i."
:-\... wow, that was one of those that i laughed at, but not becasue of the joke, becasue it was so lame i couldnt help but laugh lol
Well,Then it worked.
what did the pig say on a hot summers day at the beach?
I'M BACON