Witness

Started by Brute Force, March 03, 2006, 02:09:11 PM

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Brute Force

A Southern small-town prosecutor called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?" She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy, and

frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, cheat on your wife, manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you." The lawyer was stunned.



Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs.
Jones, do you know the defense attorney?" She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too.

He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him." The defense attorney almost died.



The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench, and in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you bast--ds asks her if she knows me, I'll throw your sorry a$$es in jail for contempt."
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